The Necronomnomnomicon

When I was younger I wanted to start a geek-rock band. The main barrier was my complete lack of musical talent. Still, I wrote down some hypothetical song ideas. This was one of them.

So I thought I’d flesh it out and share it here.

The Necronomnomnomicon

Zombies get have an awful rep,
People focus on our flaws
That means to eat what’s in their heads,
You’ll have to use what you have in yours.
Luckily a book can help
With recipes like no other
For when you finally eat your neighbour, Jim
And his judgemental bastard brother.

[Chorus]
Oh, your days may be short,
But your nights can be so long,
Your cooking skills will be alright,
Even if they feel all wrong.
The tastiest of treats
And this macabre song
When you cook from the necro-
nomnomnomicon

The misnamed “farmers market”
Rarely sells fresh farmer
You’ll have to turn back to the crypts
If you like your “shopping” calmer.
The starters can be cheap,
But main’s an arm and a leg
To get your hands on fresh supplies
you’ll have to kill, steal, borrow and beg.

[Chorus]
Oh, your days may be short,
But your nights can be so long,
Your cooking skills will be alright,
Even if they feel all wrong.
The tastiest of treats
And this macabre song
When you cook from the necro-
nomnomnomicon

Collect their ickle dumplings
For a demonic casserole
A tasty meal that’s free of guilt
(Mostly ’cause you’ve got no soul).
The freshest, plumpest puppy
Pan fried in a skillet
Has an even richer flavour
if you’re the one to kill it.

[Chorus]
One tome for undead meals,
Any others would be a con.
You can still be the soul of the party
(Even if yours is long since gone).
Just have a positive attitude,
And switch the oven on,
When you read from the necro-
nomnomnomicon

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